Editor’s Note: This column is reprinted, with permission, from an NC IDEA email authored by Thom Ruhe, the president and CEO, and sent this past week in celebration of the retirement of John Austin.  One or more “facts” may be embellished, Ruhe notes. 

DURHAM – With Valentine’s Day serotonin still coursing through my veins, I sat down to write today’s missive, a fond remembrance of my colleague John Austin. BUT, before you rush off to see why #TheJohnAustin is trending, let me put your mind at ease and state that this isn’t a posthumous tribute. On the contrary, our pal John is well and willing to let you buy him a beer anytime. My intention is more like a gentle roasting, a congenial canard if you will, intended to mask our melancholy over the fact that he is leaving our employ for the earned respite of retirement. Please note, one or more of the “facts” that follow may be slightly embellished.

John Austin of Groundworks and Lacey Hendrix of Beard and Lady pose for a snapshot.

Born to Portuguese speaking Flemish beaver trappers from Moose Jaw Saskatchewan, Johannes Wolfgang Bucky von Austin was destined to become a world-renowned table tennis banjo master. Unfortunately, his bold attempts to redefine the Gregorian Chant genre of music by adding “wicked banjo riffs” would take some time for the world to embrace. And although he could qualify for an Olympic table tennis team, for one or two countries from the Australasian realm, he had to settle for hosting backyard bacchanals of paddle play.

Undeterred and clad in 1970s gym wear, with a Schwinn Varsity 10 Speed Tall Frame bicycle, he made the arduous journey from the frozen tundra to the sweet smells and warm climate of Chapel Hill. Once there, he funded his UNC master’s degree in computer science by doing some male modeling and hand rolling fine cigars. The tobacco may have been of Cuban seed, but it was Carolina grown and rolled tighter than a frog’s behind.

John also briefly considered a film career and is best known for turning down the Alec Baldwin role in Glengarry Glen Ross. Before passing on this entrepreneurship master class, John allegedly improvised the famous “Coffee is for Closers” speech made famous in the film. This creative dalliance flamed the entrepreneurial embers within that would eventually set him on a path to share his talents with others.

So it was, John eventually found himself leading our efforts to help founders realize their dreams of starting and growing companies of great potential. Pre-covid, John would host hot yoga sessions with founders, in the basement vault at American Underground. During these grueling sessions, John would grill founders on customer discovery and market fit. When asked if his methods were extreme, he would simply reply, “if you can’t make a succinct elevator pitch on the verge of heat exhaustion, how can you expect to build a great company?”

And the results speak for themselves. Among the couple dozen people reading this, there are beneficiaries of John’s tough love regimen, always delivered with care and the bedside manner of Jack Kevorkian. And if any of you want to express appreciation for John’s sage guidance, fear not! John has assured me that if we keep an acceptable inventory of microbrews, he may stop in from time to time. If you want to drop him a note, he prefers you use his NC IDEA email instead of his anime fan fiction alias of The Chika Fujiwaranastics.

Congratulations my friend on a great career of helping others realize their full potential. As the impact of our work continues to cascade throughout the state and beyond, know that your fingerprints are on all of it. You’ll be missed but you helped us build something that is becoming bigger than any one of us, and the entrepreneurial ecosystem of North Carolina is becoming a national exemplar, in large part thanks to your efforts.

Affectionately and entrepreneurially yours,

Thom Ruhe
President and CEO
NC IDEA FOUNDATION